The Wall

I've been here before

Temple of Sinawava, Zion National Park

Having followed
Accepting the invitation
Wide eyed
Open hearted
Hope filled
Stepping down a new path
Skipping
Receptive
Joyful
Trusting
So very trusting
I entered
With the promise
Of Your Presence
To then suddenly
Cruelly
Slam up against
A wall
Hard, crashing
Huge
Damning
Dark
There I wait
Befuddled
Horrified
Confused
Hope drained
I lean flat
Against its
Surface cold
I pound
I scream
Sobbing
From parts of my Soul
I didn't know
Existed
Will the tears
Ever stop?
Banging my head against
The rock
Desperately
Wondering what
Happened, where
Did I turn wrongly?
Exhausted I can
Flail about no more
I hear a rhythmic
Beat of a heart
Jesus
It's Your heart
A distant song
Becomes clearer
Louder than my
Cries I am quieted
With Love resting on
The Chest of
Jesus, My Rock.

Diane Mann, 2012